What is a MIAM?

It consists of a one hour individual meeting with a specially qualified family mediator.

The aim of the initial meeting is

• To explain to you how mediation is an alternative to the court process available to separating or divorcing couples
• To explore whether mediation would be a safe and effective alternative to court for you
• To give you the opportunity to decide whether going to court would be the best way of resolving the issues surrounding your relationship or marriage breakdown (e.g. children, property and financial issues)

How is a MIAM relevant to the court process?

Since April 2014, almost all divorcing and separating couples in England and Wales who want to use the court process to resolve any disagreements about children or money must prove that they have had a referral to a MIAM first. You generally cannot issue you an application to the Court without a record of a MIAM being attended and the mediator then has to sign the court application to give an explanation as to why mediation cannot proceed at this time. Further information has to be given to the Court about this on another form completed by your lawyer (Form FM5).

A Judge may choose not to hear a case until both people have seriously considered mediation and maybe attended it. The Judge cannot force you to go to mediation though. This means that, even if you are not quite sure that mediation or another of the Non Court Dispute Resolution (NCDR) methods is not for you, it will enable you to give a clear explanation to the Court as to the reasons why and avoid unnecessary delays.

Far more positively, the meetings give you a chance to decide, with professional assistance, how best to conduct your separation or divorce in the interests of yourself and the family.

You should advise your lawyer, and you are both recommended to take independent legal advice, that you are attending an initial meeting. If you decide to progress to mediation, you should inform your lawyer of the appointment of a mediator. It is helpful to obtain ongoing legal advice during a mediation but generally lawyers do not attend. Sometimes, friends or supporters can do so, with agreement.

Professional accreditation

The session will be conducted by a mediator who is very versed in Family law and regulated by The Family Mediation Council. They will be a member of Resolution and The Family Mediators Association.

What can I expect from the initial meeting?

Before the session takes place you will be asked to complete a confidential questionnaire.

The mediator will explain the principles upon which the mediation in the joint session would proceed, and encourage you to talk about the matters that you would like to resolve, consider whether there are any issues that may make mediation unsafe or unsuitable (such as power imbalances, fear of harm from your former partner or emotional readiness to participate in a joint session) and consider with you any alternatives to mediation to resolve your matter. You will be able to ask questions that you may feel inhibited to ask in front of your former partner Everything discussed in the session will remain confidential to you and the mediator.

Once the individual meetings have concluded the mediator will make a recommendation about next steps and the arrangements for the sessions. To proceed to the joint sessions both you and your former partner must agree on a process that is safe and suitable for you both.

Exceptions to confidentiality

Everything discussed in the individual session with the mediator is confidential and will not be shared with your former partner. There is one exception, where a person (particularly a child) is at risk of serious harm. In this situation the mediator has a duty to contact the appropriate authorities.